Thursday, March 4, 2010

Recovery from "Paramahamsa" Nithyananda

This post is dedicated all the sincere seekers who went a little bit too far into Nithyananda's sect to achieve their spiritual goals. I know it is a really bad day for all of you. It is shocking to see someone who has been revered in your families go astray. If this is all true, Nithyananda has truly tasted the reactions of his bad karma. Having sex is not the problem. Every human being would want to have sex. The problem is you are not expected to have sex when you have taken up the ocher robes. Anyway there is no point in talking about Nithyananda or his future plans or course of action. Nithyananda tasted Buddha's teaching now "Anitya -Impermanence, Dukkha - Suffering/Loss. He has brought a disgrace to the so called Acharyas and Hinduism.

You as the disciples of Nithyananda should try to find a way out for yourselves and your families (if they are involved) without getting depressed or overly saddened. I will try to give my 2 cents of advise in this post. If you have young children 5-18, I see that as the toughest part! They might have seen you listening and watching audio/video materials of Nithyananda or sat down to listen or see along with you. They might have seen you reading books/materials authored by Nithyananda. What will you tell them? How can you explain to them that whatever you considered precious a few days back are now untouchable? How will you deal with it yourself as elders? What will you tell your family friends whom you tried to bring to Nithyananda or who know that you follow Nithyananda? What will you tell your parents/brothers/sisters? How will you de-toxify your home from Nithyananda materials? I feel they will no longer be valid references now though in an unbiased opinion those materials are still good for a spiritual seeker! I hope lifebiss keeps all the youTube videos and not remove them, atleast to provide entertainment for future viewers! What should you do with your Satsangs, the organizations and the temples you have built. I think they should not be destroyed atleast outside of India. The name of Nithyananda can be systematically removed. Churches do not collapse if the spiritual leader turns out to be a gay! Why should the organizations you built with lot of effort collapse because of one guy? That is one of the problem with these gurus and Hinduism. They create their own programmes and agendas (though they might be based on Gita, Upanishads or Yoga!)

1) Fortunately Nithyananda was not a lemon and kumkum pujari type of guru whose main audience would be the uneducated and miracle seeking crowd. But he was a well read and eloquent speaker and was able to attract a large crowd of educated people and families both in India and abroad.

It is much easier for this kind of crowd to systematically remove Nithy baba from their lives and minds although it depends on the kind of involvement one has with this organization. For casual listners and watchers of his teachings and videos it is the easiest to walk away. But even for the people whose involvement is a lot larger, my sincere advise is that as long as you had a genuine intention to make your lives happier and to reduce stress, you can walk away with ease as long as you did not cling to the personality but were only interested in the teachings.

Buddhism is one religion where Buddha teaches not to cling to the teacher or the teachings. Even the teachings are like a boat to cross a river. Once crossed, take up a new vehicle. There is no use of the boat!

For those who were clinging to the personality of Nithy, it is time to unclutch! Please let your mind know that impermanence is everywhere and cannot be fought. It is a part of existence. For the future make sure that you get the honey but don't be attached to the flower.

2) If you have kids who are older than 5, and you are a family who got deeply involved in Nithy Baba, I pity you. If they are younger, just switch off Nithy Baba for a while and let time heal. They will forget that once dad and mom were involved with Nithy. If you have a little bit older kids, please tell them that he did something wrong and we cannot have his material at home. You might have to do a little explanation and I think they will take it without much trouble.

3) The society! It includes your family like moms. dads, brothers, sisters etc. What I would like to say is you need not be guilty. If anyone tries to ridicule you just ask them to shut up and tell them that you went to Nithya with a good intention to make your lives happier. Now that he turned out to be a person who does not practice what he preaches, you have decided to come out of it. Period. No more explanations. Believe in what you think about yourself and not what others think about you.

4) If you went to Nithy for attaining fame in trying to build temples or organizing events, just realize that your false pride has taken a beating and try not to do it again.

5) I donated/lost money to Nithy. Don't even worry. You have not lost anything. Be happy. You can earn it back!

6) Please have faith in dharmic religion and the law of karma. Dharmic religions are much more logical and broader than organized monotheistic religions. If you feel frustrated, please choose atheism instead. ( I had to add this after seeing some of the responses)

My personal opinion about Nithyananda is that if he is so interested in having sex, he should have quit the ocher robes and taken up family life after handing over the organization to someone else. But, if you get married you only get to have sex with one person :-) I really don't understand this sanyasi and celibate priest business. Did it start with Buddhism in India? Even Siddhartha had all the sex he wanted before he gave up worldly pleasures. Rama(7), Krishna(8) and Buddha(9), none of them were celibates. What is up with this swamis? I think 99% of humans would want to have sex.

...........I might add a few more points if something comes up......

17 comments:

Anonymous said...

Reasonably good advise. I know you already took enough time writting this blog, but request you to post it in the significant youtube faming/defaming nithy so many people can check out your opinion.

As for as the $lost it is indeed big$$$$ for lot of people and they should take a legal opinion to get some money back from the organization, though it may take a long time.

As for the temples built outside India , good points are made here and obviously you need funds to maintain this so best thing is to look for a potential acquisition from organizations like chinmaya mission, Art of living, sadhu vaswani, Baba Ramdev. As the liability issue will soon propup if people start putting cases against nithys org, best thing is to transition legally to another organization.

check out guruphiliac.blogspot.com in case you dont have your posting there.

Anonymous said...

Rama(7), Krishna(8) and Buddha(9),

I know about Krishna. But Rama and Buddha - thats news to me - would you please care to elaborate. I recognize that sex is part of life and don't understand the taboo of sex in religion. Growing up learning science more than religion I cannot understand this part of Catholism and Hinduism. Your explanation will give me a new prespective of Sanatana Dharma.

Thanks
Mike

nirseek said...

Rama, Krishna and Buddha are considered to be the 7th,8th and 9th avatars of divine in India. Rama had only one wife. Though Buddha/Siddhartha had only one wife, he was provided the company of many beautiful girls by his father so that he will not turn to asecticism. That is all I know!

nirseek said...

Celibacy is given importance so that the person practicing it can concentrate on moksha/nirvana/liberation. I am not sure if it works with a majority of practitioners!

Anonymous said...

"But he was a well read and eloquent speaker"

It is a joke right?

Anonymous said...

All the charisma that you saw coming from Nityanada in the lecture room came from his inspirations in the bedroom before the lectures. So do all the words you have written here, and in fact you yourself. Nothing comes without it. If you seek enlightenment without sex, you should worship virgin mary.

Unknown said...

Good advise indeed....

one clarification from what i understand on the celibacy part.....


yes krishna.. rama and buddha were not celibates... they enjoyed sex and realised that it is not the be all and end all of life... there is something more and that is wat they ran after to find and found it.

its not compulsory that u must be a celibate to take up spiritualism... but its essential to be a celibate when you try to focus and reach the final goal of enlightenment.

how can we have desires of the world and also desire for the divine... no man can serve two masters ... this is the only truth

so have sex... yes within marriage and give it up when you are done and run after the divine... he will surely be waiting for you and help you from there on

god bless all of us... especially nithy and rachita ... hope they get married and enjoy marital bliss

and yes a request... please do not hold hate and bitterness for nithy... he has fallen from his grace ... dharma will deal with him :) have faith in dharma and the scriptures... they are irreplaceable and invaluable

Truth or dharma is only one irrespective of who preaches it...

Anonymous said...

Really nice blog. Very well organized post. I am not a Nityananda follower. I have been following stuff after recent news. However, I am here to provide a possible explanation to the question you posed regarding celibacy in hindu dharma.

The Hindu Dharmashastras prescribe 4 stages of life: Brahmacharya, grihastha, vanaprastha, sanyasa (bachelor,married,becoming old and finally giving up everything and becoming an ascetic)

This is the recommended procedure for everybody. However, a person can skip the 2nd and 3rd stage and directly become a Sanyasin, provided he gets initiation from a qualified Guru (spiritual teacher) or attains realization himself based on his previous karma like Lord Buddha.

Celibacy is one of the vows that any sanyasin should adhere to, no matter how he reaches that state.

A truly realized soul/person, will not indulge in any activity that is for self gratification or satisfication of one's senses. Such characteristics are described in Bhagavat Gita. There have been several examples of such people like Lord Buddha, Ramana Maharishi. They do not even care to cover their bodies leave alone enjoying pleasures of the bed.

The problem with today's so called realized persons is that, they have tried to convince the public about their self-realization and in reality they are just normal people like us. For convincing people, they try to portray themselves as celibate persons. Once people see them having carnal sex, they get exposed.

Now coming to the story of Rama and Krishna, they are avatars of lord vishnu(as per Hindu mythology). Rama never knew that he was an avatar. He just showed us how to lead a life of truth and honesty. While krishna, knew that he was an avatar and his mission was something else. Nevertheless, even krishna advised people to follow and do their duty and nothing more.

So, bottom line is there is no short cut to realization or spirituality. It is only your karma that will decide. So, just do your regular duty and lead a life of truth, honesty and non-violence.

Priya said...

I agree very much to the last Anonymous post, before mine. And this is really a good post for the many followers of 'nithy baba' who are feeling betrayed and ashamed right now. I know a few people too who were his followers. So I understand their shame and disappointement.

Just my two cents worth on this:

//I really don't understand this sanyasi and celibate priest business. Did it start with Buddhism in India? Even Siddhartha had all the sex he wanted before he gave up worldly pleasures. Rama(7), Krishna(8) and Buddha(9), none of them were celibates. What is up with this swamis? I think 99% of humans would want to have sex.//

I'll just add on to what Anonymous said in the previous comment. Anonymous mentioned that a person can choose to skip stages 2 and 3 and go straight from brahmacharyam to sannyasam. Like you said, 99% of people will not choose this path. Not even the remaining 1% will choose this path, but maybe only 0.1% or 0.01%. Because that is the exception, and samsari life is the "norm".

There comes a time in a person's life when one's duhkha about the impermanence of everything hits them. Viveka is born (the ability to differentiate between what is impermanent and not impermanent), and from there the person will feel vairagya (dispassion) for everything. When this dispassion becomes tivira (very intense), then the person would immediately renounce everything and just walk out.

Sannyasam is just a physical renunciation. A real Sannyasi also renounces mentally. Sannyasa dharma also states that he/she should not own any possessions of their own, should not stay in one place for more than 3 days (must be a wandering monk), must be celibate, must eat little, must be simple... A Sannyasi wouldn't even care if he/she is walking naked... Such is their dispassion for worldly desires, objects, etc.

The lesson we have to learn from here is this. Not every person wearing an ocher robe is a saint and the ultimate authority. The people have to stop being teacher-centered and be teaching-centered. If only they had concentrated on what he was teaching them, would they know that all he's telling them is humbug. This is my opinion. Nothing he teaches actually benefits people. He is teaching all the wrong things and his logic is totally off!

For e.g., he claims that he had an experience of realization, meaning he attained moksha. But we know that any experience at all, has a beginning and an end to it. Meaning any experience is not permanent. Then how can "realization" be an experience as he claims? Our scriptures tell us, that one doesn't "become" a mukta, he/she IS a mukta, but he/she just doesn't know it, because of ignorance. Only Knowledge liberates a person. I don't think nithy baba teaches this...

Just forget him and move on... I can learn a great deal of things he teaches to his disciples for $8000 US, for a mere S$30 here in Singapore. Or even for free, because the Yoga teacher I know is my friend. Who is he to put a price on the yogic gems left for us by our Rishis for us??

Sorry to be venting everything here in your blog... Thanks for giving space for me to vent here... :)

nirseek said...

Priya said,
"The people have to stop being teacher-centered and be teaching-centered."

I wanted to convey the same thing to followers of Nithyananda. There are lot of sincere people who followed him. In India, his ashrams and establishments would obviously be taken over by land hungry politicians. But at least in other countries, they can continue under different names. There is a mega church in the state I live whose leader who preached against gays turned out to be a gay! But monotheistic religions are so organized and they did not let the church to collapse.

nirseek said...

Looks like this comment was posted unintentionally under a different post. I moved it here

Anonymous said
"I was watching those videos.It also made me to realise that probably the people must hv made him to give Viagra- I guess- It looks like- My only advice to others- You are god by yourself just like saibaba said and try to find god in yourself ( just like what Buddhism teaches) and listen to good things and follow the foot prints of Gandhi and the three monkey rules."

Anonymous said...

If you were in his presence and experienced his beautiful nature you would not me saying this. People that think they tried it and came out of it in a loss have not really gone to find God, but for other intentions. In Swamiji's presence I have felt the lord. I think God is testing you all and he is seeking to see who his real followers are. God is ever so loving and Swamiji is the incarnation of our sweet Lord. All the true spiritual masters were criticized. I love you Swamiji! Jai Gurudev:) God is watching you all and he loves you no matter what!

jake Z said...

I have been a casual listener to nithyananda on youtube. i am dispassionate about what happened because i have not given much to him, but i think he did seem like he knew things he was talking about. i did find a few times he did give brilliant answers , sometimes a brilliant spin avoiding the answer and some times he was just arrogant with an arrogant laugh. i always had a suspicion about him because no one really charges $10,000 because that does seem like a very unsaintly fees. another thing about his claims that this is partially morphed, a few videos are out im wondering if you have checked them out. here is one.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8Ni_A10Arkc

nylobrown said...

enlightenment transcends personality and character.
if krishna was around today he would be be facing this pressure as well.krishna had thousands of gopi's ,some of whom were married women..but yet no one speaks bout it.ppl cover up by saying those relationships were spiritual. at tat time there were no digital cameras to prove otherwise.so it was convenient to term them spiritual.
a master will not be shaken because enlightenment transcends societal needs..only a true seeker will understand this.

nylobrown said...

do not feel ashamed of your master as u are no one yet to judge him...

Unknown said...

sex is not sin...sin is doing the whole act behind the saffron robes and cheating on people. marry a woman and have sex. why some random woman who is disturbed herself(ranjeetha) in marriage and has come to seek peace .she was very vulnerable at that point and he made use of it.now he has ruined her completely and what little bit she was socially active, she cant be.no act should be done, if it adversely affect others.

nirseek said...

I accidentally rejected a comment where someone was responding to @gita. I apologize. Can you submit again please.